...To Remind Me Why Atch Cannot Stay Up With the Baby
All about:
Atch,
Eli,
staying up with the baby
Atch means well. He usually does. He is a consistently reliable provider, a supportive partner, a loving parent, the family chauffeur, a fixer of all things broken, and most importantly, he cooks. But if the good Lord giveth talents overflowing, He also provideth chasms of fantastic incompetence, as I was reminded all too clearly the other night when Atch volunteered to stay up with the baby.
I was feeling under the weather at 3 o'clock in the morning when Eli commenced to wail as per his two-hour alarm schedule. Atch roused himself, weaving his groggy way from bed to crib. Three quarters asleep, I was witness to the following "conversation" :
Eli: Waaaaa-aaaaaah-aaaaaah!
Atch: (lifting the baby off the crib and settling them both on the lounging chair) It's okay, sleep, sleep (humming "Moon River" under his breath while patting the baby's bottom).
Eli: Waaaaaah!
Atch: Sleep, Eli, sleep.
Eli: Waaah...*whimper-whimper*....waaaa...
Atch: Shhhhh..... (immediately falling asleep himself and snoring into the now quiet baby's ear)
Eli: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
Atch: (starting awake and commencing to pat the baby furiously) Sleep! Eli! Sleep! $%^&*#+##$!!!
Eli: Waaaaaaaaaaah!
Atch: If you don't sleep, I'll whup you!
(Whappak!)
Eli: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
At this point, unable to take any more, I forced myself to get up and take the hysterical baby away from his brutish arms. Atch made his way back to bed and was snoring in 2.5 seconds.
As Eli settled down in my arms, sleepy memories trickled back of the one other time, centuries ago, when I pleaded with Atch to sooth a screaming baby Woog (forerunner of the every two-hour infant alarm clock). The screaming never abated and I opened my eyes to Atch violently swinging the crib on its wheels around and around the room. He said he was rocking Woog to sleep.
Eli & his Tatay on the infamous lounging chair
The following morning, Atch ruffled Eli's curls as he sat on his high-chair for breakfast, "Who got whupped last night?" He teased.
Eli flashed his two-tooth gums at him and gave a delighted gurgle.
I am so glad babies have such short memories.
I was feeling under the weather at 3 o'clock in the morning when Eli commenced to wail as per his two-hour alarm schedule. Atch roused himself, weaving his groggy way from bed to crib. Three quarters asleep, I was witness to the following "conversation" :
Eli: Waaaaa-aaaaaah-aaaaaah!
Atch: (lifting the baby off the crib and settling them both on the lounging chair) It's okay, sleep, sleep (humming "Moon River" under his breath while patting the baby's bottom).
Eli: Waaaaaah!
Atch: Sleep, Eli, sleep.
Eli: Waaah...*whimper-whimper*....waaaa...
Atch: Shhhhh..... (immediately falling asleep himself and snoring into the now quiet baby's ear)
Eli: Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
Atch: (starting awake and commencing to pat the baby furiously) Sleep! Eli! Sleep! $%^&*#+##$!!!
Eli: Waaaaaaaaaaah!
Atch: If you don't sleep, I'll whup you!
(Whappak!)
Eli: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
At this point, unable to take any more, I forced myself to get up and take the hysterical baby away from his brutish arms. Atch made his way back to bed and was snoring in 2.5 seconds.
As Eli settled down in my arms, sleepy memories trickled back of the one other time, centuries ago, when I pleaded with Atch to sooth a screaming baby Woog (forerunner of the every two-hour infant alarm clock). The screaming never abated and I opened my eyes to Atch violently swinging the crib on its wheels around and around the room. He said he was rocking Woog to sleep.
Eli & his Tatay on the infamous lounging chairThe following morning, Atch ruffled Eli's curls as he sat on his high-chair for breakfast, "Who got whupped last night?" He teased.
Eli flashed his two-tooth gums at him and gave a delighted gurgle.
I am so glad babies have such short memories.
3 comments:
I love that story. I think men have a lot less patience than women do, though I do admit to losing it a few times myself. Men seem to want instant gratification - I want you to sleep, so you must sleep...NOW! And, yes, thank goodness babies have short memories...I totally agree!
Hey you shouldn't complain - mine doesn't cook and doesn't get up with our kids, more so because he sleeps right through them crying, puking, hoping in bed with us.
Granted they are good providers, partners, but equals to "moms" they are not.
Thanks for sharing.
Thanks for reading, you guys. Having fellow moms like you around validates so many of my mommy thoughts and tribulations, I feel I'm in good company.
God bless and happy mothering!
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